Sunday, April 25, 2010


I was feeling nauseated, and it occurred to me that I hadn't gotten my period, so I made Wil go out and get me the following items:

1. Chicken soup
2. Ginger Ale
3. A pregnancy test.

I quickly consumed the soup and nursed the ginger ale. I decided it was time to tackle the pregnancy test.

I ripped open the box and threw the directions to the side. I figured, I've done this before, I know exactly what to do this time! After I peed on the stick, the following results popped up nearly instantaneously:

I ran out of the bathroom and told Wil:
"We're having a baby!"

We were excited, despite the fact that we don't have a lot of money at the moment.

For the next few days I went around telling close friends that I, indeed, was expecting a second child. I was nauseated, craving certain foods, the works. I even stopped coffee for a few days!
I made an appointment with a midwife to see how far along I was.

On one of my daily trips to the restroom, I noticed the second pregnancy test staring me the face. I decided, for some unknown reason, to take the second test. The same result came up, but then I looked at the box:

I realized that I was a complete moron! I wasn't pregnant! I assumed I was with child because both boxes had a line in them. One of them being the "control" box and the second one being the "you're pregnant" box. However, I failed to look at the box, which clearly tells the user to check for a plus (+) sign.

The crazy thing is that I was experiencing many of the early pregnancy symptoms. I guess it was the placebo effect, I believed that I was pregnant, so my body compensated.

The next few days were filled with me telling my friends that I was completely insane.

The moral of the story: read directions.

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  1. Holy shit. That's embarrasing. Hope you're ok with the outcome.....

  2. Oh Well when we were trying I thought I was pregnant even when I wasn't. So weird but I think our bodies like to freak us out.

  3. Keyona- I know right?? So embarrassing! I was bummed, I really got excited there for a moment!

    Julie- Our bodies are funny like that, it's true!

  4. Man, I was like really bummed by the end of this blog.

  5. Amanda- I know! I'm bummed in real life. You know what I need right now? Some of your cookies!!

  6. Oh yeah. I really hate that specific brand of tests because of that. Also? The digital brand because it's so in your face about the answer.

  7. HA HA HA! Yes! The digital test can be offensive! I remember the first test that I took with Ari was so simple! It was like "pink line" = pregnant!

  8. OMG YOU SCARED THE HELL OUT OF ME!!! LOL!! But IF/WHEN you do, I have stuff :)

  9. Lol, Cordy is the all-powerful giver of baby stuff! Now I think Ari definitely needs a sibling.

  10. Wow. Yikes. Hey - we didn't get a phone call! >:-( Lol.

    You know, you guys are WAY overdue for a get-together! Maybe we should just do lunch in Brooklyn some Sunday!

  11. We are way overdue!! We want to come for Shabbos! But lunch is Brooklyn is cool too!:000

    I was on the verge of calling you guys actually! And then I took the 2nd test :(((

  12. Darn! I'm sorry. What a let-down! :(

  13. Kyndale- I know :( so sad.

    Holly - Anytime, lady!;)

  14. ROFL!

    You make my life. I heart you tons.

    P.S. Get pregnant RIGHT NOW :D

  15. that is why I love the invention of the digital read out...I have taken 2 of those and they were correct both times.

  16. Next time, should there be a next time, I will buy the idiot proof ... I mean digital test!

    Guess what? I'm pregnant now!

  17. haha, this story is too funny! i believe in the body/mind connection and this is proof we can do whatever we put our minds to!


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