Tuesday, February 9, 2010

The Couple's Journal

This morning, I feel okay about Wil's night shift. The reason I feel alright about it is because of something called "The Couple's Journal." I recently wrote a post complaining about my boyfriend (Wilhem's) night shift. Click here to read it.

Essentially the gist of the post, if you are too lazy to read it, is that Wil works from 8pm to 5am in the morning. I never see him at night, and he sleeps during the day. It's a really lonely and frustrating situation. In the post, I asked if anyone had been through a similar experience:

My brilliant friend, Amanda, who writes Stumptowncrunch, posted a comment that said the following:

YES! The first year of our marriage Yasir worked from midnight-8am, slept for 3 hours, worked his second job from noon to 8pm, slept for 3 hours, and started all over again. We'd keep a "couple's journal" that we wrote in since we'd often go a week or more without seeing each other's faces (I worked and took night classes 5 days a week) so it was hard!!!

I found an old journal in my bookcase and I placed it in the most obvious place I could think of that Wil and I both frequent: the bathroom:

I have to admit, when Amanda suggested the Couple's Journal as a solution, my immediate thought was:

I know I'll write in it. But Wil probably won't.

So I took a shot at it. Last night I wrote Wil a note in the journal about how difficult Ari was being, and how he kicked me in the face and all he wanted to do was watch TV. I wrote about how tired I was and how I missed him.

The next morning (today) I awoke and asked sleepy Wil if he wrote in the journal. He mumbled "Yes." So I went into the bathroom to check it out.

Low and behold he did write in it! And it was a long letter about how work was boring and how he hated his shift. He even drew a picture of all three of us:

So far I like the Couple's Journal. Thanks Amanda!


  1. AW!!!!!!!!!! That is SO Cute!! I love the idea Amanda! I have a "Chaim's @$$hole Log" because he told me to write down what he does since I get REALLY mad at him, but then we always seem to forget. Lol. I don't really write in it though. :)

  2. OMG!!!! That is the cutest thing ever! We used to draw pictures too...once Yasir drew a stick-figure that said, "I love you this much" and his arms spanned two pages. I love looking back at it and it even makes me cry sometimes.

    I hope it becomes a habit for you guys and that Wil does it without you having to ask about it. So funny that you keep it in the bathroom! Good idea, we should have done that.

  3. What a great idea! It sounds like your guy really cares about you. I hope that it's possible to change shifts sometime in the future?? When Amelia was 6 months old, Jonathan had to live several hours away for the week. I would only see him on the weekend. When he got back, he would totally throw our schedule off. It was very lonely.

  4. What an awesome idea! Cute journal too! :)

  5. Thanks everyone!!

    Cordy- the a$$&$## journal sounds really cathartic and funny! Brilliant idea!

    Amanda- It was really cute! Yasir's drawing sounds adorable, the one with the outstretched arms ;)

    Keyona- I love this journal!!! It's so cool! I forgot where I got it, but it is leather and carved.

    Kyndale- Wil wants to swift shifts. He said in his note he is going to try for an afternoon shift, 12 to 8pm.

  6. Oh, and Amanda, I couldn't think of another place to leave it BESIDES the bathroom, even though I know it's a little weird. ;)

  7. The Couplels Journal is a wonderful idea. Sounds like you can say nice stuff in it that sometimes you wouldn't say to the person. I like it.


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