Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Dear Person I Offended

Dear Person I Offended,

You will probably never read this letter, because we are no longer connected through the world of social media. I'm going to say these things anyway because I feel them. I wrote about my past. My past is something that haunts me. I feel things deeply. I use this space to express them. Sometimes they're not pretty things. They are my reality. I told a story: that story involved you. I'm sorry if the way that I told the story offended you.

I am hurt by the way that you treated me in the past. I tried to tell you many times, but you ignored my attempts to express my feelings. I honor your feelings. I am willing to hear them, however, you do not feel the same about mine.

You called me offensive.
You said that I was nasty towards you.
I'm sorry you feel that way.
I feel badly that my truth and my words impacted you like that.
It was not my intention to hurt you.
It was my intention to tell my side of a story.

I am open to hearing your side.

But when you reached out to me to tell me how you felt, I was scared. I freaked out. I told you I couldn't talk about it. There are extremely scary things that I'm dealing with in my life at the moment. There are harsh life challenges that require my 100 percent focus. My family needs me more than anything.

You say you were upset by my words, and your response was to call me names.

I want to make something clear to you, I did not call you names in what I wrote. I expressed genuine emotions. You may disagree or feel that I'm telling the story wrong, and you are entitled to you opinion, but please allow me to have mine.

Again, I apologize for any anger, pain, hurt and other emotions that I may have ignited in you. But I do not apologize for telling my story.

I wish you all the best.


  1. Exactly. I don't want to silence anyone and I don't need anyone to silence me.

  2. This post is amazing!!! Love it.

  3. It is really amazing. He's onto something here.

  4. You're awesome, David! Thank you for not being content to just hide upstairs with your Xbox. One of the hardest lessons upon becoming a parent was learning that mom is the default. Like they were born with an instruction manual we're not willing to share. But our "maternal instinct" only goes so far, and largely, it's a misnomer. If no one challenges it, though, moms will do what moms do, and dads will do what dads do. Someone's gotta push and it's awesome when it's dad. Because you know what? Mom's don't have time to fight the fight - the last thing we need is one MORE person we have to get to listen to us. So thanks for taking the lead, dads out there who take the lead. You ARE appreciated and you ARE up to the job.

  5. When I learned that my wife was the kids' go-to default, I was pretty
    happy. But now I'm sorta like "hey, what about me?" I mean, I do a ton
    of the housework and childcare, do the morning prep and the bed times
    too. I cook many of the meals, do dishes, laundry, barf duty, poop
    duty, bath duty... But I really feel sometimes that the kids couldn't
    care less about me. It sucks. I want them to remember me as "being there" with them. Giving them to mommy all the time doesn't get this job done. It's only when I send their mommy away
    that they really want to invest in playtime with me, or just sit and
    watch Doctor Who with me without screaming for something constantly.
    I've learned that encouraging their mom take off so that I can handle
    things is good currency for arguments, and also makes her less grumpy so
    that I can get laid more. Breaking it down, being a good man and doing
    the work means you get to be a hero to your kids, and hot to your
    wife. Awesome.

  6. Thank you for recognizing my awesomeness. Being a dad when mom is around, is a lot like being picked last for kickball. Sure, you get to play but only after being humiliated. Not that I would know anything about being picked last. I was/am an amazing athlete. In fact, I was going to go pro. The Lakers tried to draft me. They wanted me to be their starting Quarterback, but I turned them down. I didn't want to spend all my time traveling.

  7. Thank you. My post loves you back.

  8. I just peed a little on myself while laughing at that.

  9. You made a smart business decision.


What do you think? Feel free to agree or disagree, but hateful comments will be deleted.