The right side of my neck and my right arm were hurting for days. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me?! I considered consulting WebMD, but then I realized that I didn't need the internet to diagnose me, I could do the job myself.
The diagnosis:
Mom Arm
The symptoms: One of your arms (depending on whether you're a righty or a lefty) hurts like a bitch from lifting children every single day of your life.
Those who are predisposed to Mom Arm: Moms.
Is it contagious? No, but you might rob the people around you of their sanity by complaining about it.
The cure: Stop carrying your kids. Tell them to walk, even if they're babies. Wait...that's not going to work. I guess the cure is rest. Oh, but you can't do that either.
So the real answer is, Mom Arm is a chronic condition for which THERE IS NO CURE!
Do you have this condition or do you have another chronic condition that you coined yourself?
sleeping baby nursing back. that painful condition that arises when you nurse a baby continously in bed while trying to sleep in a very unnatural and uncomfortable position.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very uncomfortable condition. I understand. Your back is sad :(
DeleteBending down to pick up after everyone all day long back.
ReplyDeleteThis was such a hilarious post. "Those who are predisposed to Mom Arm: Moms." LOL!
"Bending down to pick up after everyone all day long back" is another condition for which, sadly there is no cure. *Sigh. The only way to temporarily alleviate this condition is to telepathically direct your rage at those who do not pick their shit up.
DeleteLOL, I have Mom Arm, Mom shoulder, and Mom neck. But only on the right side.
ReplyDeleteOh yes, my ailment is only on the right side. Cursed Mom Arm! I think Mom Neck is quite possibly the worst of those three.
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