Saturday, October 22, 2011

The Top 10 Reasons Why My Cell Phone Makes Me Lazy

Cell phones have taken over the 21st century. There's not much the average Smartphone they can't do, which is why (I've determined) that my Samsung Gravity Smart is making me lazy. All I have to do it push a button or two and I get instant gratification. No, this is not an ad for my cell phone. I've only had this phone for a month and a half, and I'm actually very angry with T-Mobile right now; look what happened to my screen when I dropped my phone on the sidewalk once:

Regardless of the cracked screen, this phone is making me one of the laziest humans alive. Here's why.

10. Checking the time- I'm embarrassed to admit, that I don't own a watch. Whenever I need to check the time, I click the side button on my phone and there it is in glowing white numbers:

It makes me a little more depressed each time I do it. I think back to all the watches I used to have throughout the years. This one was one of my favorites:

The problem with relying exclusively on my cell phone for time checks it that when it "dies" and I'm out in the real world, I have no idea what time it is. Then I rely upon the kindness of strangers to give me the time. I believe it's time for me to invest in a watch!

9. Taking Pictures- Who needs a "real camera?" I have my cell phone. It can take pictures like this:

8. Entertaining The Kids- Let's face it, kids get cranky in public. Have you ever tried to go out to lunch with a nine month-old? It's tough. Wil found an app on my phone called "Toddler Lock" that fascinates Samara to no end.

You want to see what it looks like, don't you? Okay fine!

She can touch and bang on the screen, even eat the phone, and it produces colorful shapes in response. It's pretty genius. But, it makes me too lazy to figure out a non-technology based solution when she's going apeshit in public.

7. Email - I don't need to open my lap top and turn it on to check my email. All I need to do is touch a couple of buttons on my phone, and voila! There it is!

6. Texting and/or Emailing Versus Real Human Interaction - People hardly call one another anymore! Why call someone, when you can just click a couple of buttons to say "how's your day going?" I'm not a proponent of this, but I feel like I had to jump on the texting bandwagon because people don't seem to have the time to talk anymore. They're so busy with life, that they'd rather text and/or email. I've actually started to fight against this in my freelance writing work. If someone emails me a job offer, and their phone number is in the signature line of the message, I call them! That way I don't feel like I'm writing to a robot.

5. Alarm Clocks- I don't own an alarm clock. Well, that's not entirely true, my alarm clocks have names, they're called "Ari" and "Samara." If Wil or I want to wake up at a time that is not related to the kids, we just use our phones! It makes me a little sad, once again, and I remember my parent's alarm clock, circa 1985, The Sony Dream Machine. Jason Mayo from Outnumbered shows us what this baby can do in this fantastic video, if you're interested:

4. Oh The Things You Can Do! - I don't need to go to the bank, visit an ATM, or even go online to check my bank account balance. I have an application on my cell phone that can do that. Wait, oh no! I need to transfer money from one account to another! I can do it on my phone.

Let's say, I feel like applying for graduate school, I can do it online...on my phone! This is craziness.

Ari has watched the entire Toy Story movie, on Wil's phone. Because that's possible.

3. Facebook- I have the Facebook application on my phone, and (I have to admit) it contributes to 75 % of my laziness. There's no need to wonder what my friends are up to, all I have to do is look at my piece of shit phone.

2. I Wonder... I wonder what song that quote is from, I'll just google it, on my phone. I wonder what street that restaurant is on...I'd better consult my phone! Who was that guy in that movie with the mustache who drove a pink convertible and owned a white poodle? I know! I'll ask my phone! How do I get where I'm going? I'm lost in a scary neighborhood! I'll just use the GPS...on my phone!

1. The number one reason that my cell phone makes me one of the laziest homo sapiens on the face of the planet is the calculator. I know this might be a surprising number one reason, but it's true!

I use the cell phone calculator when I'm budgeting money for groceries, bills, and other expenses. I use it when I total up invoices for my writing gigs. I use it to balance my bank account. I use this thing probably 50 times a day or more. I went to staples yesterday with the kids, and I saw this:

And once again, I found myself getting a little sad.

From writing this list, I've learned there are a fews things I am lacking in my life. Here's a list of items I must purchase immediately:
  • Watch
  • Alarm clock
  • Calculator
  • Non-Technology based baby games
How does your cell phone make you lazy?


  1. Totally with you on this. I make a conscious effort not to use my phone to keep Lilah entertained, but sometimes it just feels necessary. Mainly we use it when we think she's going to fall asleep in the car but we'd prefer she have a proper nap at home.

    I've found in addition to making me lazy, it's given me ADD. I am CONSTANTLY checking my phone for one reason or another, and often it's just habit. It makes me kinda twitchy, and I'm pretty sure that's not a good thing.

    I did recently start wearing a watch again, though, so now I feel like I'm kickin' it old school!

  2. They are absolutely AMAZING! I LOVE LOVE LOVE what they can do. It's so funny that you wrote this because I was walking down Fraser St in my nieghbourhood, which is a downmarket multiethnic street and noticed that EVERY SINGLE BUSINESS has a clock on the wall (NONE of them digital)! It's like 1995 on my street. Who has clocks anymore? Still it made me love my neighbourhood.

  3. I would have to say the number one thing that makes me lazy due to my phone is that we have a 2nd detached garage that my husband seems to always be in. Instead of walking 20 feet to go ask him why he drank the last beer, or to ask him for money to go get more beer, I'll call him. Which is funny, because if I am really asking for money, I will still have to walk at some point to go get it...I also love when I see 2 people in the same room facebooking with eachother..I mean, come one now. Although, if my husband was cool enough to have a facebook, I would probably be guilty of this myself.

  4. As one of the few people left without a smart phone? I'm very, very envious of your laziness!

  5. i am also using a samsung galaxy y.i am really satisfied with it's performance but i wish my kid can play children education games too on my phone.


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