Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Mom Arm

The right side of my neck and my right arm were hurting for days. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with me?! I considered consulting WebMD, but then I realized that I didn't need the internet to diagnose me, I could do the job myself.

The diagnosis:

Mom Arm


The symptoms: One of your arms (depending on whether you're a righty or a lefty) hurts like a bitch from lifting children every single day of your life.

Those who are predisposed to Mom Arm: Moms.

Is it contagious? No, but you might rob the people around you of their sanity by complaining about it.

The cure: Stop carrying your kids. Tell them to walk, even if they're babies. Wait...that's not going to work. I guess the cure is rest. Oh, but you can't do that either.

So the real answer is, Mom Arm is a chronic condition for which THERE IS NO CURE!

Do you have this condition or do you have another chronic condition that you coined yourself?

6 comments:

  1. sleeping baby nursing back. that painful condition that arises when you nurse a baby continously in bed while trying to sleep in a very unnatural and uncomfortable position.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This is a very uncomfortable condition. I understand. Your back is sad :(

      Delete
  2. Bending down to pick up after everyone all day long back.

    This was such a hilarious post. "Those who are predisposed to Mom Arm: Moms." LOL!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Bending down to pick up after everyone all day long back" is another condition for which, sadly there is no cure. *Sigh. The only way to temporarily alleviate this condition is to telepathically direct your rage at those who do not pick their shit up.

      Delete
  3. LOL, I have Mom Arm, Mom shoulder, and Mom neck. But only on the right side.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh yes, my ailment is only on the right side. Cursed Mom Arm! I think Mom Neck is quite possibly the worst of those three.

      Delete

What do you think? Feel free to agree or disagree, but hateful comments will be deleted.